When we decided to move
forward with Sergii's adoption, there was no war going on. There were small
protests on the streets of Kiev, much like the small protests here in the U.S.
As we moved at lightning speed to get our homestudy and dossier done, the unrest
grew. About two weeks before our
appointment was scheduled in Ukraine to officially accept his referral, his
region, Lugansk, was shut down for adoptions because of the fighting and danger
of anyone traveling there. Shortly after that, hundreds of children, Sergii
included, were moved from Lugansk to a safer region more west. The children
remain there in the safe region and are to remain until the fighting has
stopped.
Adoptions remain closed in
the Lugansk and Donetsk regions. We are not the only ones who were in the
process of adopting a child/ren from these regions. I imagine there are will
over a hundred children who have families adopting them, but cannot finish.
There are at least 30 children and their families that I know of.
Under Ukraine adoption law,
adoption can only happen at the place of the registered location of the child. Since
Sergii is from Lugansk, his paperwork is there. We must accept his referral in
Lugansk, and attend adoption court in Lugansk. This is not possible. We don't
even know if his paperwork still exists.
Best case scenario is that
the war ends quickly and that his paperwork can be located, and that the court
house and orphanage is still standing. As it is right now, there is no food, electricity, medicine, open
stores, banks, etc. The government buildings have been bombed and the
orphanages/boarding schools have been overtaken by the rebels and used for
barracks.
I am in contact with others
in country who have met with the State Department of Adoptions, and the Deputy
Minister of Family and Children. And as of yet, other than relocating these
refugee orphans and getting them out of the war zone, there has been no effort
in getting their paperwork out of the region. No effort in salvaging any of the
in-process Lugansk adoptions. Understandable, as there is a war going on there.
The sad thing is that there is no desire or effort by the governing authorities
to help these children become documented again. Not just so that they can be
adopted, but so that can be given diplomas, accepted into trade school or
college, even given a job. Without paperwork they are 'nobody.' A lot of these
children are of graduating age and need documents so that they can attempt to
get a life on their own.
Bringing Sergii home most
likely will not happen for a long time. It could take months... even years. Of
course we are hoping that it doesn't. Desperate times call for desperate
measures, right? And that is definitely the case here. Paperwork can be remade as they have copies of some,
if not all, of the paperwork in Kiev. The issue is the region being almost
completely demolished, and that is where the adoption is supposed to take
place. Seems easy enough to just have court somewhere else. Problem solved! Nope… problem is Ukraine is a 'by-the-book' type of country. Anything
outside of protocol to them is like a foreign language. Like speaking 'alien.'
It's like chopping the head off of an ant, or taking a fish out of water and
watching it flail. At this point, and I fear
for a very long time, Ukraine's avoidance of the issue will be easier than
dealing with it. Also, my in-country friend told me that these gov't
departments have the attitude that there are plenty of other adoptions going on… (meaning that they are not going to attempt to
clear these Lugansk and Donetsk kids for adoption any time soon.)
Dealing with this has been
completely and utterly heartbreaking and beyond stressful. I don't know how
much of this Sergii knows. But I do know that he trusts us. He knows we will
never ever give up. I have drilled that into his sweet and precious heart again
and again. He knows we will do whatever it takes to get him here.
Our adoption paperwork that
sits in Kiev expires in January. We will most likely have to redo our paperwork
to adopt Sergii, when the time comes. The paperwork is grueling to say the
least. It is stressful, and not to mention expensive. Fingerprints have to be
redone, child abuse clearances, criminal records, doctor visits, blood work,
etc. All of that adds up.
Our social worker happened to
approve us for two children. We love our social worker and he obviously has a
sense of knowing things we don't. He's a Christian man and I know he clearly
was led to do this--because we did not ask to be approved for two.
Do you know where I'm going
with this?
In June, Sammy and I spent
over a week in Ukraine, and most of those days were visiting orphans in the
same camp that Sergii was in. We spent a lot of hours with these children.
Precious children! They broke our hearts. We fell in love with so many. We
entertained the idea of even more children, but we were there for Sergii. There
were so many other pre-teens and teens that chose to hang out with us. These
beautiful over-sized babies need and want momma's and daddy's just as much as
the wee little ones do. They would literally sit in your lap if they could.
Many of them waited near the gates for us to come just to be with us. I thought
about my kids at home and how they are so comfortable and safe, and don't even
realize it. They are that way because of the love and boundaries they receive
from their 'constant.' These children lack that 'constant' in their lives. The
only constant they know is uncertainty. They don't have that unconditional love
and approval. They don't have boundaries set before them lovingly. They don't
have hugs and kisses and affirmation when they fall or fail at something. Ahhh… but I digress.
This is very hard for me to
acknowledge and accept, but we have to face the possibility that we may never
be able to bring Sergii home, though we will never stop trying. Because we were
approved for two children, Sammy and I have decided to head back to Ukraine, to
a safe region, and bring home a child before our paperwork expires. And when
adoptions open back up for the Lugansk kids, we will be the first ones in
Ukraine to bring our son, Sergii, home. And then we will have two beautiful
Ukrainian children to call ours.
It is hard for us, after seeing so many
children who need families, to not take in one more. Our paperwork to adopt is finished
and is sitting in Kiev right now. I don't want to pass up this opportunity and
let all that work go to waste when there are children who need homes.
So we are asking you to
join us in prayer for direction regarding a few available children right now.
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